If I had a band...

Not that I'd ever have a band. I don't play a musical instrument. I do sing, but not in any type of way that would make me worthy of actually performing for people. But I do have a ton of names for potential bands. I was almost hesitant to write this post because suppose someone somewhere hears one of these names and likes it, starts to use it as their band name, and then they achieve fame and fortune without ever giving props to me about it? But then I figured, it would all be documented on this interweb business, and also, why would I begrudge someone a cool band name I happened to dream up? It's not like I'm going to use it.

No idea how this all started, but have you ever said something and thought that it would make a great band name? Or a great name for a bar? I had an idea for a bar. I was going to call it "The Space Bar." Like a space bar on a keyboard, but it could also be like outer space.

Anyway, one day years ago I ran into the woman who lived downstairs from me. Her name was Sashi and she used to dye her hair purple. So I asked my roommate at the time what she thought of Sashi's dye job, and it occurred to me that it was a GREAT name for a band. Sashi's Dye Job.

Well, some people at work had the same idea and we started to keep a running list of potential band names. Like someone would say something, and someone else would seize on it as being a good band name. Not all of these names originated that way, but a good chunk of them. Here are a few:

1. Beat the Hese. I worked with a guy whose last name was Heser, and I believe I was competing with him in a football pool? Anyway, voila. Band name.

2. Shift the Bubble. This had something to do with the NCAA basketball playoffs, which teams were 'on the bubble,' that kind of thing.

3. Baloney Pony. Origin unknown.

4. Long Yellow Pad. Because we keep the band names listed on a long yellow pad of paper.

5. Gone Postal. 'Nuff said.

6. Eight Grade Nun. There are a lot of Catholics here.

7. Squishy Bottom. A coworker commented that the bottom of her stapler was squishy.

8. Howard Sprague's Groovy Bachelor Pad. Reference to the Andy Griffith show.

9. Silent Rhythm. See #3.

10. Rebellious Cog. Referring to someone who refused to be a 'cog in a wheel of the machine.'

11. Whitehurst. Green Bay quarterback from 1977-1983.

12. Knife Wielding Savages. No clue.

13. Credit the Cat. Again, no idea.

14. Ramen Phase. Referencing the phase that all college students or young poor people go through when they eat lots and lots of Ramen noodles.

15. Chester Marcol. Former Packers place kicker. Yeah, we're Packer fans here.

16. Scotty Under the Sink. Refers to a conversation overheard by a friend of mine while on staying at a bed and breakfast. Some family strife that led to their youngest child hiding under the sink and not coming out.

17. Adam Slim. A descriptor of a certain type of slim resembling a guy named Adam.

18. Gas the Bird. One of mine. I'll explain in some other post.

19. Steak Boy. I called my friend Tim that because of his highly anticipated dinner at Coerper's 5 O'Clock Club, known for their steaks.

20. Spaetzle. German dumplings/noodles.

Well, those are the best of them. I've had this list for years and years and years. Always makes me laugh.

But please, if you happen to hear a song by Sashi's Dye Job on the radio, please tell me. I've got some suing to do.